The Giving Hands

Leigh @ Thoughtprints is a fellow PayPerPost postie and a fellow Blogathoner and she is blogging for the R.O.S.E. Fund (Regaining One’s Self Esteem Fund).

Leigh maintains a site she named Prism of Whispers many years ago. “It’s a personal site where my poetry lives, along with a lot of other things near and dear to my heart, including some graphic art I did, and a small collection of e-cards,” she said in an “email interview”. Besides Prism of Whispers, Leigh also recently started a dog forum called Retriever Breeds Online.

Leigh sent me an email the other day because I was looking for volunteers to be “interviewed” at the PayPerPost forum. You see, Leigh has 2 sisters, and both of them have severe fibromyalgia. Fibromyalgia is a very mysterious disease, and one the medical community hasn’t been able to really put their finger on as far as how one gets it. They do know, however, that it can follow a trauma in one’s life, whether it be physical, mental or emtional.

“And because they live in a very small town, and although more and more people are being diagnosed with fibromyalgia every single day, is still not something at the “forefront”. In fact, it will probably take a while before there’s any kind of support group or anything like that here where we live,” Leigh said.

Fortunately, neither of Leigh’s sisters are at a stage where they would need constant care and they both live alone. However, Leigh and her sisters did do home care for their mother for about 3 years before she died, and she had severe fibromyalgia, as well. “She was in so much pain that she had trouble walking from one room of her house to another. I pray that my sisters never get to that place,” Leigh recounted.

Leigh’s mother will always will be her hero. She raised her sisters and her all by herself, with only the help of her parents, and did a fantastic job! In fact, she is her constant inspiration.

When Leigh and her sisters were taking care of their mother, one of the hardest obstacle was finding truly good, well-trained people to help with homecare. Another was getting doctors to listen to them. “Unfortunately, a seemingly high percentage of doctors tend to “poo poo” older people and treat them like they’re stupid, demented, or both. It was EXTREMELY maddening! But the absolute hardest thing was watching as she went downhill over a 3 year period and not being able to do anything to make it better. It was truly devastating. The feeling of helplessness was overwhelming,” she said.

Even though Leigh isn’t the main care giver to her sisters or their deceased mother, she feels that the main issue faced by people with disabilities is the fact that they were never listened to.

Well, first of all, doctors need to listen to their patients, whether they’re young OR old! We all know our own bodies and when something is wrong! Also, I think insurance companies need to take stock in the elderly population and realize there are younger family members taking care of them, and most times need a lot of help! They should pay for that help! In this country, Medicare will pay for some home health care, but only after meeting extremely narrow criteria. It’s horrible! We, as a nation and as a government, need to take better care of our elderly!

And to raise awareness among the general public, Leigh has this to say:

I want people to lose their fear of looking into the eyes of a disabled person. They’re not sick. They’re not going to bite. They’re DISABLED, and most of the time would really appreciate a friendly smile a a “hello”. Don’t be afraid OF them, and don’t be afraid to talk TO them. They’re people, just like the rest of us. And please, if it’s in your power to help that person, do it! It will help them, and make you feel like a million bucks!